Q3

Q3). Pick one concept from the reading this week and discuss it in detail.

A: The topic which I would like to discuss this week is the section labeled "Don't Sweat the Small Stuff". I think that after knowing someone a long time and being very comfortable with them we start to see more and more of their flaws enlarged. What we "dismiss" in the beginning may become the thing we hate the most about the person. In my own personal relationship, one that I'm not very comfortable with is his messiness. His trunk is like a junkyard and I dismiss it sometimes and I start nagging at him sometimes to clean it up. But, then I mentally decided in my mind, instead of getting angry at him for a dirty trunk I should just clean it up myself. Probably will only take me 20 minutes to get everything cleaned, deodorized and in vacuumed.

Q2

Q:2). In this chapter, you have read about some of the ways in which marriage has changed over time.  Based on cultural trends and evolving values of your generation, what changes in marriage would you predict over the next 50 years?

A: Over the next 50 years I expect families to have less face to face communication and more technological communication. Since the development of instant messaging and cell phones we have spent less and less time face to face with others. Since we are currently growing up in this stage of technology it is likely that in the future, this is how we will act with our families. The google glasses is a pretty accurate description of what I think future communication will be like. It will be portable and around you almost 24/7. You can voice call, video call, send email and messages anywhere and to anyone. I imagine data will be much more affordable as well.

Q1

Q: 1). How do you define family?  What do family members do for each other? Which types of relationships discussed in this chapter do and do not fit your definition?

A: I define family as people whom I am genetically related to and people whom I can rely on as support no matter what.  There are some things and only family members are willing to do for you and help me through. For example, you want to get a loan to buy a house and you need someone to co-sign for you. Which basically means, if you can't pay it off the person much pay for you. Not a lot of friends are willing to do that. Another example is, your car broke down and you want to get it fixed. It costs around seven thousand to repair, and instead of taking out a loan you family member can lend you the money and you can just pay them back.

Q3

Q3: free post
A: This week I wish to discuss how people's pride get in the way of their true self and lifestyle. They desire to live a certain life, or they think that they must act a certain way to gain people's liking and will buy physical things or say things to purposely deceit others. For example, a high school student driving a new Honda and has a LV backpack. We all know she can not afford those things; those things have been gifted to her. She struts around school and every one gives her compliments. Because she went home too late last night she drives to school the next day with a regular jansport backpack and her old beat up pick up truck. She her pride just got shattered. Desperate to get her "face" back her makes up lies saying she crashed her car and this is her dad's beat up car and her LV purse is at home. But the truth is, she drove her mom's new car and her LV purse was face. Lies and deceit in real life don't get you far, your pride gets hurt because you climbed to the top for the pyramid for the day and now you fall back down to the bottom.

Q2

Q2). Have you experienced relationships in which love or commitment, but not both, were present?  Describe relationships in which there was commitment but not love.  What can you conclude about the impact of each?

A:  I have experienced relationships where love was present but not commitment. I was under a lot of stress in high school and barely had enough time to breathe and relax. I loved my dog. I adored her. She had been my friend since I moved here to San Jose. She was there by my side licking my face every time I cried and she was just always there within arms reach. In elementary school and middle school I went outside to play with her daily. I spoke to her as if she understood and she would always nudge me or lick me at the right times when I am sitting there telling her my problems. Last year, she had passed away. I look back and realized as soon as I entered high school I neglected her entirely. I barely socialized with her. I'd see her outside the window when I come home waiting for me to go outside and play with her. But, I went home everyday after swim practice worn out, hungry, and needed to rush me homework and hit the sacks at 10. I think that, in the end, when I was there with her, till the last moment whens he looked into my eyes it was as if she said it is ok. I had her buried in our backyard because she belong here, with me. It's been a year and I now have new dogs. I go and pet them and feed them daily. I am going to spoil them rotten and commit to them 80% of the time. And when I can't hold my end of the string I know that my mom will step in and help. But, I have learned that time is precious. You must love and commit before you lose everything.

Q1

Q:1). Some critics (Van Gelder, 1991, Stone, 1996) of online communities believe that there is greater potential for deceit in online relationships than in face-to-face ones.  They point out that in online relationships, people may misrepresent their appearance, sex, sexual orientation, and so forth.  Do you think it is ethical for people to represent themselves inaccurately?  Do you think that deception is more likely in online than in face-to-face interaction, or are different kinds of deception equally likely in the two kinds of interaction?

A: I do not think that it is ethical for people to conjure up a online identity. By falsely providing information they are creating a person whom does not exist. Most times when on the internet we provide true information because the truth is always easier than spreading false lies. However, some people choose to conceal their true identity and create an online self whom they can be and are proud of. They then disconnect from the real world and play out their live virtually. Deception is most commonly found online because they other person can only take your word for everything you say. Versus, if you were face to face with someone their body language and the way they act can sometimes give away if they are telling the truth or not. Of course, some have trained their body to not gives signals which they are lying. But, in the end, the truth will spew out in real life. 

Q3

Q3). Pick one concept from the reading this week and discuss it in detail.
A: The concept or topic I want to talk about this week is Bosses and Buddies found on page 260. I think that this is a super important thing to note because this is the main reason why people hire stranger to work for them rather than a friend or family member.  It is inevitable to make great friends at a workplace. You are with your coworker around 8 hours a day, of course with time you will make a friend or a few friends. What if one day they become your manager? What if you start slacking because you know that your friend will give you a break just because you are friends? What if they fire you when you thought they were going to excuse you just because you guys are pals? There is bound to be issues of superiority. Should they enforce work rules and give you a hard time and possibly fire you and ruin the friendship or should they sweep it under the rug? I think that the best scenario is to just be casual friends. And make sure you have your act together at all times. Once or twice a slipup is ok and can be swept under the rug but if you take advantage of it, your time is done. So, what if your best friend is your manager and you are the employee that he/she hired? You should separate work and friendship in this case. They offer you a position, meaning they help you secure an income. It is up to you to keep your butt on the line just like everyone else and not slack. Because it not only makes you look bad, it makes them look bad as well for letting you in. A really good proverb here is "give you an inch and you think you own the world". 

Q2

Q2). Think about someone who is a very close or best friend.  Describe the investments you and your friend have made in the relationship.  Describe how you build and communicate trust, acceptance, and closeness.  Are the dynamics of your friendship consistent with those identified by researchers as discussed in this chapter?


A: I think my closest relationship asides from my boyfriend at the current moment is my elementary school best friend. We come from entirely different backgrounds. She was a true American while I was a traditional Asian. We both don't quite know how we became friends. Maybe it was because we were assigned to sit together on the first day of class. I didn't have any friends since I just moved to San Jose. I would follow her around with my broken English and we would hang out everyday in class, recess and lunch. We would seldom give each other presents because I really don't enjoy spending someone else's money even as a child. So I made things for her. I guess because of the time we spent together. All of our fights, bickering, helping each other get closer to our crushes, playing games together helped us get closer and closer. I really think that spending time face to face with someone brings you so much closer than virtual friends whom you text or message daily. We trusted each other with our deepest secrets such as growing up and becoming an adult, what we didn't like about the world and how it would be like if we were the parents. We accepted our differences and were fascinated on how much our worlds differ. A classic American family is very hard to come by since most people in my side of town are Asian. In my year of middle school there were only three Caucasian's! The dynamics of our relationship really do correlate to the chapter. I am grateful to have had her daily in my life. I know that she is still local but since we went to a difference high school our views have grown different and so have our social circles. I trust that if one day, I am in deep trouble and need her help she will be there to lend a hand because I will certainly do that for her with great open arms as soon as she asks,